I finally got the opportunity to watch The Dark Knight on Tuesday. Hmm… watching movies after work can be quite fun! After Pauline taught me the shortest & cheapest route to Midvalley from the workplace, it’s really convenient to stop by as well. ^_^ Anyway, I was realllllyyyyy tired from work matters, so perhaps I wasn’t in the “right” frame of mind to watch the movie. I’ve only watched it once though, so any mistakes in the below review-cum-rant – please forgive. ;P Spoilers aplenty, so proceed with caution, hehe.
The main reason why I’m inspired to write about TDK is because Ben keeps going, “It’s so awesome, it has so many layers, it appeals to everybody, there’s always something to talk about, MAGGIE GYLLENHAAL IS HOT etc etc.” I kinda stirred at the last point, wtf is this boy on!
This is how Maggie Gyllenhaal looks like when she’s supposed to be all sexy.
I donno.. these pictures are kinda disturbing. It’s like looking at granny porn or something. *shivers*
Don’t get me wrong – I do think that it’s an absolutely fun movie, plenty of cool action sequences, great acting from Michael Caine, Heath Ledger, Gary Oldman and Aaron Eckhart… but it wasn’t like it freaking CHANGED my life or anything. Whether I watched it or not, it doesn’t make a difference to me. Yes, it’s intelligent enough and interesting enough but it’s not something that has me thinking and analysing over and over again. I am more moved by books than by movies, perhaps I’m just an elitist bitch that way. I’m just not going to pretend that TDK is any more than a slightly-above-average typical summer superhero movie. So yeah, if you want to moon over the gadgets / technology / improbable getaway plans then go ahead, just don’t claim that this show is some kind of masterpiece, which it isn’t. And fyi, aside from the car-that-ejects-driver-onto-awesome-bike, I didn’t find the other gadgets very nifty. Over convoluted and pretentious, yes.
Even the philosophical experiments fail to inspire me on the shreds of goodness left in Gotham City. Maybe that guy just didn’t want to blow up the occupants of the other ship because he theorised that The Joker could’ve switched the rigs to either blow up the occupant’s own ships or BOTH ships. Who knows?
And what’s all the hoo-hah over Christian Bale anyway? It’s like all you whores didn’t watch The Prestige or Batman Begins (I won’t bother listing the rest of his movies, if you didn’t even watch this two then I’m shocked you even watched TDK). Haiyoh.
As far as spunky lead actresses go, Maggie Gyllenhaal’s not one of them. Ben was going on about how he appreciates people who do speak up to save someone else, how they hold on to their principles and ethics and “fought a fight they thought worth fighting for”. Something like that, don’t mind if I ad-lib, do ya? Well, personally I’m a firm believer of not saving people who freaking ask for it. What if, by taunting The Joker, she got her droopy little mouth sliced up? Is she still considered oh-so-brave and full of principles? I would just look at her and say, “There’s no point in trying to win a tiny scuffle when there is a war out there to be fought.” If you truly are someone who can make a difference, don’t waste your time doing things that will gain you nothing in the end!! The side that you are fighting for loses a valuable soldier, and your “brave” actions only feed the pleasure of the enemy.
Stupid!! Never learned in Moral class before aR? Berani tanpa membuta tuli – that means, be brave, but not in a haphazard, impetuous manner. This applies to Harvey Dent as well. *Sigh* All these typical good guys gone bad are so short sighted.
Back to Maggie : I really can’t stand looking at her. For a simple and no-dimension role like Rachel Dawes, I can’t see why they couldn’t get a better looking actress. Someone said they chose Maggie because she looks the most like Katie Holmes. WTF. Ok, if they’re going for the “I’m so stressed by my life as a DA and so stressed from hiding Bruce Wayne’s secret identity” look, then I guess they chose correctly by going for the droopy-eyed, droopy-cheeked, droopy-mouth and droopy-breasts Maggie Gyllenhaal. It’s already half the battle won when her entire physical attributes shows how little life there is left in her. As for kneeing The Joker in the balls… again, it’s an act of stupidity to me, not bravery. So I just cannot look at her character and say, “Wow, no wonder Batman loves her!” I can only think, “I guess Bruce Wayne has a fetish for septagenarians.” Oh, and if you want to praise her for doing a better job than Katie Holmes, don’t bother. That’s a given. Anyone could’ve done a better job than Katie Holmes. Dakota Fanning would be a more believable love interest for Bruce Wayne than Katie Holmes.
This is the beginning of one of my favorite scenes in the movie.
Mmm.. violence. I like.
I keep wondering why anyone would want to be The Joker’s henchman. Unless they are all from the Happy Hospital, why get mixed up with a man who is going to burn your wages before your eyes? And I cannot get over how over-the-top his plans are. Like, hello, you think it’s so easy to go around rigging bombs all over a hospital WITHOUT BEING SEEN ar. And some more so clever to rig it so that when they go off, the entire building collapses so elegantly. Yeah yeah, I’m a freaking killjoy.
I also got unexplainably annoyed at the fact that they were speaking Mandarin in Hong Kong. THEY SPEAK CANTONESE THERE, YO. Ben said I can pretend that it’s a Mainland China company setting shop in downtown Hong Kong, but I can’t. Everyone spoke Mandarin there and they looked so typically un-HK. You know, they weren’t bustling around and being loud-mouthed dramamama enough. Hahhaha. And after that I kept straining to hear if they would speak even one word of Cantonese. Like, can we hear some “Mm Koi”s and “Dor Cher”s instead of “Xie xie”s?? [Ben said he heard one security guard speak in Cantonese. I can't ascertain because I didn't watch TDK 4 times. 
]
Ben also said something about how arguments could be had over whether it is right for Batman to take law into his own hands, e.g: dropping Marconi and breaking his legs when he refused to give information. What is there to argue about? That was one of the most enjoyable scenes in the movie (along with car ejecting bike, trailer flipping, Rachel Dawes dying, etc). I say yay for vigilantes. If I was Batman, you can be sure the torture methods would be much worse. Things like slicing / shredding of flesh with blunt cleavers, pouring of acidic liquids onto open wounds, slow pulling of intestines from tiny incisions, etc etc. You criminals better be glad that the only thing Batman will give you is a 1-2 knockout.
Having said all that, I’m not denying that this is an enjoyable show and it’s definitely not run-of-the-mill. I’ve already stated my point on why I’m expelling so much vitriol over this. I think I might be a victim of having my expectations raised too high and then not getting what I thought was a fair exchange for the hopes invested.
Felt sad that Heath Ledger won’t be in the next instalment of Batman, I mean — he promised us that The Joker would love to continue toying with Batman! But hey, life moves on, I’m not crying over it (although I cried over Commissioner Gordon, haha!). Oh, I wanted to blog about this about 7 months back, but life caught up with me and I guess there’s no better time than now to blog about it. I sent a message to all my friends on the morning of 23rd January 2008, saying “Oh my God! Heath Ledger died! They announced this on Fly.fm and apparently he committed suicide! Why!!” These are the replies I received :
Simon Choy : Who is heath ledger?
[later]
Simon Choy : Hmmm, wonder if they finish filming his part for that movie, else batman is screwed
Iza Iskandar : r u sure? wher did u get dis? oh my God!
[later]
*sends me an email with freaking 1MB size photo of Heath Ledger in black and white*
Fazlynn : Really..sad..yea..what you doin today?
Kim Chia : Yeah, i saw the news… i remember him in 10Things, but didn’t watch Brokeback. These days, Hollywood actors always taking their own lives. Tsk tsk.
[that 'tsk tsk' statement made me ROFL. For some reason, imagining Kim as a stern grandmother who would go to the afterlife to cane Heath for being such a disobedient boy.]
Fadhlin : Oh damn..Heath ledger cant die now! Wat does he hafta b so depressed abt 
Jennifer W : Sorry din reply msg. Super blur was still sleeping when your msg came in. 
anyway Friday.. [irrelevent to initial message sent out, lol]
Haih, why are my friends so nonchalant. Especially my boyfriend. -__- Oh, and I did send sms to Ben, who I would’ve expected the biggest reaction to, but apparently he changed numbers again and he never received it. T_T Otherwise sure got a very dramatic response from him. Anyway Ben, this post wasn’t to ‘hentam’ you in any way, I am more or less enjoying the experience of ‘hentam-ing’ Maggie Gyllenhaal, hehehe.
Leaving you with an awesome picture from SuperDickery. That site has me snorting oatmeal out of my nose at 8am in the office! The one Ben introduced me to was their gallery called “The Seduction of the Innocent”, which was mainly about how many gay innuendos were (un?)wittingly mentioned / drawn in comics. Mainly featuring Batman and Robin, and “Seduction of the Innocent” because Batman was being seduced by Robin. Lol.
The name of the website (and the main point, I guess?) comes from them trying to prove that Superman is a dick and “goes about dicking his friends”. Erm, not copulating, more like mind-fcuking them. And after you’ve viewed all 247 images under that gallery, you’ll look at Superman in an entirely different light…
Pretty heartless isn’t it? Yet I laughed my arse off. You really wonder what those people at Marvel were thinking!
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